The Scents of the WSOP

Dan O’Brien grabbed me as I was walking by his table, trying to get some shots and info.  “Hey, my buddies want to know what my chip count is sitting at.”  Jon, Steve, Frank, and Andy:  quit your whining!  We’re here to please.  Dan is sitting at $62k and change.

They are letting in less spectators now, so it has an eerie, empty feeling, sort of like the soccer teams when one team has had some horrible riot and they play in an empty stadum.  Or maybe like how the Expos used to feel.  Inside the ropes, it is extremely crowded.  Redundant chip counters bump into each other, the hierarchy thrown on its head currently.  Some of us swoop in like hawks for a raid every two hours.  Different species found in the small aisles of the room:  player seat changers, masseuse, drink people, floor, ESPN, CardPlayer, media, WSOP officials.  Occasionally, you’ll see sponsors as well (Miller Brewing Co has a couple folks who wonder around).  If you can make it out, there are probably 15-20 people standing in the photo above.

There are distinct odors and scents that I now associate with the WSOP.  In no particular order:

• Two-day-old body odor without deodorant.  We used to call it the funk of a thousand men, but it is distinctive, a reek that needs no explanation.  As the crowd pushes into the room, you can immediately see the group part as a funky cold medina plows through.  After five days of this, the fish don’t part quite as easily.
• Locker room funk.  This is a different type of odor, more of a sweat and lethargy than the other b.o.  After 1:00AM, this is the prevalent smell at the tables.
• Men’s restroom after the break.  We call it poopy.  When it’s one of your boys, it is a tell that drives next step decisions (ideally, getting him close enough to his Mom so that she can change him; otherwise, it’s in my lap).  The men’s room is remarkably clean most of the time save the piles of paper after hands are dried.  The poopy smell is only after a break, never after the dinner break.
• Perfume.  The fragrance industry works on pheromones to attract the opposite sex in their formulations.  Well, here it is less about pheromones and more about just being able to smell something nice.  Moths to the flame.
• Stripper perfume:  This is that lovely mix of cheap perfume with nicotine.  It is an unnatural gas produced by the combination of these two plus sweat, makeup, and skin cells.  Strike a match, and an explosion could result.  Also can be used as a candle refill.
• Aux de Media room :  Baking coffee, locker room funk, and an excretion caused by deadlines missed or reported chip counts that do not match CardPlayer.  Incidentally, my understanding is that they’ll simply type in a wrong number here or there simply to cause others to be fired at competing media outlets.

As many of you have emailed how much you’d like to be here, well you can now.  Just go to your nearest strip club without putting on deodorant for two days, then hang out in the men’s restroom all night.  Bring your laptop to play at PokerStars, and you’re there.

Final photos before heading to dinner.

Lottidah, winner of the Bodog swag.  Congrats, Deborah, and thanks for stopping by.

Jason Strasser sitting on a monster stack.   strassa2 is running over all comers and is an absolute relentless force.  $236k, top five in chippies.

This was a cause of concern when I went by, but now it’s looking very good with Ivey at $54k.

Ferguson isn’t going away, at least I hope not. The level of concentration these guys has never ceases to amaze me.  You really have to walk by them thirty times in five hours and see them watching these cards to understand.

Scary spice.  I think I’d be more concerned with the second tier great players than the first tier.  I know I’m not outplaying Ivey, but maybe I’m good enough to outplay this dude.  Probably not.  I’ll get in one more post later.

SWAG ALERT:  Giving away two packages of at least the current CardPlayer from here, Harrah’s cap that they gave away, then some other things I throw in.  Leave comment and email me at csquard@gmail.com, and it’s all yours.  Off to dinner with all the celebrity bloggers (Otis, CJ, Wil, Pauly).  They let me sit at a table next to them.  Later, and thanks for stopping by.