I have played very little in the past few weeks, as life has taken a front seat to the poker wagon and has guided me elsewhere from the online games of late.

This was our table line-up:

Seat 1: PokerHack07 (1500 in chips)
Seat 2: ThunderBob (1500 in chips)
Seat 3: PokerWorks (1500 in chips)
Seat 4: jbharshaw (1500 in chips) is sitting out
Seat 5: grupper (1500 in chips)
Seat 6: boldcatt (1500 in chips) is sitting out
Seat 7: Alexe55 (1500 in chips)
ThunderBob: posts small blind 10

And we all started at the final table! SWEET!

The group was pretty much a Chatty Kathy kind of crowd, even Grupper got involved in our conversation this time, that was really nice. And he left early again. Methinks he’s got a hot date or something going on and he drops in to play poker for a bit and then speeds off to an evening of?????

Alexe55 was high on tea and said so:
Alexe55 said, “Organic Green tea w jasmine mmmmm”
Alexe55 said, “From china – Maybe with Melamine”

jb got his coffee pregame:
jbharshaw said, “Several cups now that DST is over.”

I was on coffee too, not sure what the rest of the players were on. But ThunderBob’s focus was on the big bucks:
ThunderBob said, “I really need this 20, lol”

PokerHack set him straight:
PokerHack07 said, “it not the $$ Bob its the bragging rights lol”

So I got involved:
PokerWorks said, “me 2″
PokerWorks said, “my BR is gone”

And PokerHack, the leader of the bankroll pack here on Chasing Chris chimed in:
PokerHack07 said, “hanging on to mine by toenails”

I added a little humor (damn little) to the fact that I have no BR after a year of playing:
PokerWorks said, “I’ve logged a lot of tournament hours, nothing to show for it really. except the bald spots in my head”

Alexe55 apparently started with the same goals as we did as one point:
Alexe55 said, “When I started I ran 0 to $2,100 – but it was a lot easier then”

And after I singled out Grupper with a hello, he responded.
grupper said, “Hello, O’ driver of the great grey truck”

Alexe55 tossed in a priceless nugget at this point:
Alexe55 said, “So much for all the publicity for the final table hey”

Perhaps you will need to read this article to appreciate the priceless nugget.

We were up to hand #17 by now and we started talking about the November 9 and this Saturday. Naw…I won’t try to cover it. Jennifer Newell will be there reporting for PokerWorks and she does such a great job.

We got into a little gab about Razz:
willythewise said, “I gotta b careful dont want to miss razz”

PokerWorks said, “lmao”

PokerWorks said, “yeah, the real reason I have empty patchs on my head”

grupper said, “is that a legal game?”

PokerWorks said, “I won one of those micro limit razz tourneys, wanted to kill the Card Fairy all the way through it”

PokerWorks said, “I’ve always said Razz players eat their dead.”

grupper said, “this it”

PokerWorks said, “yeah, take a bad hand and make it worse”

willythewise said, “now this is close to the sickest game in the world”

grupper said, “they dont play this in real life, do they, only in make believe”

jbharshaw said, “This might be the simplest game available.”

PokerWorks said, “it’s in bobby’s room all the time”

grupper said, “thats in make believe”

As we chatted along, we played.

At hand #35, We lost willythewise – actually I beat him in the hand and it was RAZZ.

This was one funny question:
Alexe55 said, “Have u seen anyone shot at the tables? Have u shot anyone”

PokerWorks said, “shooting would end their misery”
PokerWorks said, “and they want to be miserable, so I say let them”

ThunderBob took out PokerHack and JB in the same hand – #58

PokerWorks said, “jeez”
jbharshaw [observer] said, “Well GL all.”
PokerWorks said, “player killer Bob”
Alexe55 said, “gg”
PokerHack07 [observer] said, “GL have fun”
PokerWorks said, “thanks JB and Hack”
ThunderBob said, “ty, gg”

Grupper was still in – sitting out – ThunderBob and I were wondering if he would outlast us. And ThunderBob queried, “Even chop?”

No one answered and we played on. ThunderBob was out next in the 200-400 level in Holdem, compliments of Alexe55.

Grupper made it to hand 82 before he blinded out.

Alexe55 said, “gg grup”
PokerWorks said, “thanks for playing grupper”

I put a crappy beat on boldcatt, actually two of them back to back but the first one was the worst. Alexe55 busted boldcatt in an Omaha hi/lo hand but he didn’t have much left to argue with by that time.

Then it was heads-up and I had 7947 to Alexe55 4053:

Alexe55 said, “Grrrrrrrr are u scared”

We were at 400-800 and it only took 2 hands of Razz, where I bet every street, to give Alexe55 first place.

Seat 3: PokerWorks (button) mucked [6h 5d 9s Ac 3c 7c Kc]
Seat 7: Alexe55 showed [6s Ah Tc 3h 2s 4d Jh] and won (8080) with Lo: 6,4,3,2,A

Seat 3: PokerWorks (button) showed [8h 2d 6h Th 3d 9h 3c] and lost with Lo: 9,8,6,3,2
Seat 7: Alexe55 showed [Ac 2s Ts 9d 3s Qh 7s] and won (6134) with Lo: 9,7,3,2,A

Congratulations and thanks for playing Alexe55 – and everyone.

Wow! I got 2nd place and was totally tickled pink to have played the event. Yah, it’s a lot more fun than you would imagine when you can chatter box and hang out after you bust out, and no one’s annoyed because of the chat…it’s the main reason to be there.

There was a lot more chat going on. jb asked if Tony G. would make it sometime and the following day I had a chat with Tony and he said if his schedule permits, most definitely he will. I plan on reminding him about the next event.

Although the Chasing Chris Ferguson project is coming to an end for PokerHack and MaxieCat, it isn’t for me. I will continue to play with the theory that I can win from the -0- starting point and show a profit one of these days…a sizable profit. I will be back with one more post on the 13th or shortly after, which is the final day. After that these pages will be available but will be archived and you can follow my hellish bankroll ride at Table Tango.

As far as the PokerWorks HORSE Tourney it’s going to continue every two weeks. Be there!

See You There.

SEE YOU THERE! And don’t forget, See you there!

I think I need to add that it’s almost impossible for the average person, it may not be for the kid that sits there with 12 games loaded up at the same time and devotes 15 hours a day to playing poker.

This project will reach a one year anniversary on the 13th of this month. My card runs have been so bad, for so long, I even checked to see if we started it on Friday 13th…hahahahaaaa. Nope, can’t blame the starting day so it must be the Card Fairy.

I am still playing, right now as a matter of fact, in 10 FPP Rebuy, win a share of Ivan Demidov, on PokerStars. One thing I do know, if you don’t play, you will never know what it’s like to master you and your emotional control and reasoning, you can truly accomplish and if you’ve watched TV poker, and paid attention to what’s going on, millionaires are happening every second or so due to poker’s gigantic possibilities.

The PokerWorks HORSE Tournament will begin this Sunday, November 2nd, at 2100 EST, that’s 6 p.m. Linda time. You only have 4 days and 4 hours to prepare yourself for the insanity and get registered. You will find it at PokerStars, under ‘tourney’ – ‘private’, ‘PokerWorks Family’. The tournament # is 117214558 and the password is ‘donkeys’. C U there Donks and Donkettes.

I may be the last blogger standing here…none of my blogging budettes have been on for awhile. Methinks the year has been a tough one for trying to overcome this huge feat, perhaps they are playing right now? Or perhaps have decided to reflect upon the year and then share their thoughts here? Or started a fire in a hibachi with ripped up cyber cards with hopes the Card Fairy will swoop in the see what the commotion is all about – and with her wings singed from being a nosy little bitch – will fall into the flames? YES-S-S-S-S-S-S-S! I love the last idea!

Later Kids. I’m working on a piece of Ivan and need to concentrate!

So this is how it goes. I’m in the PokerStars 200K Sunday Guaranteed – buy-in $10+1. At one point, during the $15-30 level, I posted my BB and UTG went all-in for over $4K in chips (how fucking ridiculous is that?) and got called, not by me but someone that had 10-10. UTG showed 4-5 offsuit. Nice play pal! He lost, but he had enough chips left that he stayed for awhile longer and did the chip roller coaster until he got knocked out.

At one point when I was BB, I looked at 4-3C and without a raise pre-flop from any of my table mates, I flopped a four flush and everyone checked. The turn brought a 4, I bet min amount and got one caller. The River gave me a flush – it’s probably the first flush I’ve made in 3 weeks – and I bet $120 or something small and got called by 7-4 offsuit. I won the pot. It gave me a few chips to make it to the $75-$150 blind level – perhaps I stole a few blinds along the way, who can remember? I’ve played so many hands/tournaments/games that I lose track of most of it. Don’t we all?

I never picked up a hand. Please don’t try to explain to me what a playable hand is, if I had picked up 10-9 suited I would have called or raised with the right action, I picked up absolutely nothing that fit together, looked like it came out of the same cyberdeck that others were playing with or anything. I have carpal finger from hitting fold. It sux.

I finally picked up J-10 off (which I’ve pitched a million times BTW) in the SB when I had 2760 left in chips. Everyone folded back to me and I raised it another $450 to a total of $600 and mjsa111 (BB) raised it $1255 more going all-in. I thought about it for a few seconds and did the ‘fug it’ thing and called. He turned over 9-9

*** FLOP *** [4s 5s As]
*** TURN *** [4s 5s As] [Kh]
*** RIVER *** [4s 5s As Kh] [Ts]
*** SHOW DOWN ***
PokerWorks: shows [Jc Td] (a pair of Tens)
mjsa111: shows [9s 9d] (a flush, Ace high)
mjsa111 collected 3710 from pot

Regardless of what anyone thinks of my play of the hand, I don’t care. By the time I picked up J-10 off, it was like looking at A-A. I kid you not, that’s how dry the card run had been, in not only this tournament but the last 30 or so. And I already committed chips to the pot and I made the decision to play the hand. I have no problem with the outcome. I do have a problem with dipshit, braindead, dumbfuck, gotta tell you that you played bad after they beat you.

I still had around 900 in chips left so I got to stick around long enough to stir up a little shit myself. And I see no reason that I should sit quietly and not say anything when getting lippy to an asshole is one of the best parts of poker, not to mention a S-T-U-P-I-D asshole that doesn’t even get it.

The Chat Box***

mjsa111 said, “nice call”

PokerWorks said, “nice hand.”

PokerWorks said, “I love happy winners”

mjsa111 said, “lol u call all in with j10 of”

mjsa111 said, “thats bad over all”

Stoooooooned said, “i think he thought bluff”

PokerWorks said, “my day isn’t complete without reading what one player thinks of another”

Stoooooooned said, “cuz u know he didnt think he had the best hand”

PokerWorks said, “thank you for rating my play”

Bechstein001 said, “sigh”

PokerWorks said, “and I am NOT a HE”

Bechstein001 said, “lol”

Bechstein001 said, “well that explains a lot”

PokerWorks said, “but you are so wonderful to give me a break by telling me I played badly”

mjsa111 said, “lol iz just sick risk all his chips with nothing”

Stoooooooned said, “u r not a he”

PokerWorks said, “yes it does, a woman has more sense than to act like an idiot when they win a hand”

Stoooooooned said, “wat u doin after this?”

PokerWorks said, “looking for you baby”

Bechstein001 said, “uiiii”

Stoooooooned said, “haha”

PokerWorks said, “u woke up in the BB with 9-9, since you reraised me, I’m supposed to autopilot you onto a big hand?”

PokerWorks said, “how long have you been playing online tournaments?”

Bechstein001 said, “oh cmon now its over”

sag04j said, “that was bs tilt i had the best hand and it got disconnected”

Stoooooooned said, “i think pokerwork bad call”

Stoooooooned said, “u had ****”

PokerWorks said, “truthfully, I don’t care what any of you thought”

Bechstein001 said, “good then stop”

PokerWorks said, “It’s my $ and I’ll play the way I want”

Bechstein001 said, “anotther 10k to go for money”

Bechstein001 said, “5 hrs and u argue”

mjsa111 said, “lol guys its a 10$ donkament tourney, but j 10 ofsuit is a very bad call with this blinds over”

Bechstein001 said, “about 10j offsuit”

PokerWorks said, “thank you again mjsa, I have noted you too”

mjsa111 said, “what u noted??”

Bechstein001 said, “he calls allin pair”

PokerWorks said, “that you’re a poor winner that wants to give poker lessons”

mjsa111 said, “ok thats fine”

PokerWorks said, “hahahaaaa”

PokerWorks said, “thank you for approving my notes”

Bechstein001 said, “still not done?”

PokerWorks said, “not til Mr. Wonderful stuffs it”

I finally ended up with J-7D, with about 600 left in chips, and pushed when there were four other players in the hand. I ran into Aces. WTF? If I had Aces it would have come 3 diamonds. I left the table, honestly laughing my ass off at the fact that dimrod probably thought that’s what I wrote about him in my notes, and if I told him something negative, was he going to report me? Or get the Secret Note Scraper/Fairy to sneak in and change them after I logged out?

My BR runs between $25 and $50. I can’t seem to move up or do anything. Poker goes on and so do I!

And I need a favor, if anyone of you downloaded PokerStars from this blog and opened a real money account, please send me an email “geenen at pokerworks.com” because my two co-bloggers would really like to receive notice that someone read their work and did, in fact, get involved in the game from reading here. PLEASE! Do that for us.

What did I just say there?

I’M GETTING THE SHIT BEAT OUT OF ME AGAIN!

The hands have been a repeater of the last four to five months of play. I often wonder if anyone at PokerStars support ever reads the Player Notes that one ID leaves, they must die laughing if they do. Will they someday be published somewhere for the world to see them in the cyber felt annals of Notes? Like will the government confiscate them and search through them for espionage and use them as another reason to add more control because we are gambling sickos that swear? We could counter back that they are therapy and we aren’t hurting anyone, huddled behind our monitors, blasting out obscenities at our beats.

My note taking sometimes consists of very detailed hand play, including the blinds, what position the fucking donkey was in, and the action. Some of my note taking is strictly a crying, potty mouth tirade. I’m sure if aliens analyzed my notes, they would think that Fuck was close to the only word I knew how to spell and type…however, if they are Poker Playing Aliens, they would completely understand and elbow each other as they laughed appreciatively about how freely I used it.

Check out this hand, it knocked me out of three tournaments:

10FPP Hold’em No Limit – Level I (10/20) – 2008/10/23 22:45:03 ET

Table ’111468727 79′ 9-max Seat #4 is the button
Seat 1: packitinnow (1440 in chips)
Seat 2: PokerWorks (1360 in chips)
Seat 3: shrtnhry (1470 in chips)
Seat 4: magnatecapo (3280 in chips)
Seat 5: jayzhome (1400 in chips)
Seat 6: jdquik (1700 in chips)
Seat 7: JBluff23 (1120 in chips)
Seat 8: momo157 (1710 in chips)
jayzhome: posts small blind 10
jdquik: posts big blind 20

*** HOLE CARDS ***

Dealt to PokerWorks [Ah Ac]

JBluff23: calls 20
momo157: calls 20
packitinnow: calls 20
PokerWorks: raises 180 to 200
shrtnhry: calls 200
magnatecapo: folds
jayzhome: folds
jdquik: folds
JBluff23: calls 180
momo157: folds
packitinnow: folds

*** FLOP *** [2h As 6c]

JBluff23: checks
PokerWorks: bets 340
shrtnhry: folds
JBluff23: calls 340

*** TURN *** [2h As 6c] [Ts]

JBluff23: checks
PokerWorks: bets 460
JBluff23: raises 120 to 580 and is all-in
PokerWorks: calls 120

*** RIVER *** [2h As 6c Ts] [5c]

*** SHOW DOWN ***

JBluff23: shows [3s 4s] (a straight, Deuce to Six)
PokerWorks: shows [Ah Ac] (three of a kind, Aces)
JBluff23 collected 2510 from pot
PokerWorks is sitting out

I didn’t even NOTE JBluff23, I simply closed the PokerStars client and dumped out of 2 other tournaments I was playing in – that’s how this hand knocked me out of three tournaments. If I noted him (yes, I hope he visits/googles his online name/reads), it would have been something like, Fuckball happened to know what cards were coming off of the fucking deck, that’s why he fucking check raised me for the last of his fucking chips with fucking 4 high.

The funniest part of the whole thing is I wasn’t mad. I just shut out poker for awhile and did something else. But I will put JBluff23 on my Player List. Not because I’m dying to play with him but I would definitely be happy to if the opportunity ever arises. And the next time I play cards with him, I will note him. It will probably be something like, Dear God, please never let this guy lose his job or run out of money or piss his mom off so she won’t give him poker funds.

Did you think Grandmoms didn’t swear? HAHAHAHAAAA-HAHAHAHAH! I love to swear. I don’t swear around my grandkids and in certain gatherings and around certain people. It’s not necessary to swear to get your point across.

Sometimes it just feels so damn good to curse! And that’s why I love online poker…you can rant and rave and no one is offended by your ranting, especially when you live alone. And poker players are the ones that taught me everything I know in Potty Mouth 101.

Right now I’m trying to win a piece of Pete Eastgate in a FPP buy-in tourney. G’luck, potty mouth Grandmom!