Grubby at PokerWorks

Last Christmas, I was bitten by a dog.

This Christmas, I was bitten by a donkey.

The first day of Christmas vacation in California, and I landed at celebrity airport Santa Ana (a.k.a. John Wayne Airport, pilgrim) but didn’t spot any celebrities. I’d stayed up all night for fear of sleeping through the alarm and didn’t sleep on the plane because I was scrunched in the middle seat and wanted to watch My Little Sunshine, as edited as it was. I’m still fighting the idea of Greg Kinnear as a real actor, even though he’s been great in everything I’ve seen. Mark Wahlberg and Will Smith won me over in my head, but Kinnear’s taking longer because all I see is his silly mug on “Talk Soup.”

First on the agenda was a great little Pho place with spring rolls and boba, then met grubette’s friends at a 75-year-old bar called Joe Jost, made famous by eventual comeback queen Whitney Houston in My Bodyguard.

Ate pretzels, drank beer from a frosted glass, and threw peanut shells on the ground.

Also sucked up an egg that I didn’t realize was pickled until I’d stuffed the whole thing in my mouth.

grubette quickly snapped a picture for future blackmail.

Started nodding off at the table and when we got home, all I wanted to do was crawl into my inflatable mattress and sleep.

So we went to play poker at Hawaiian Gardens.

The casino looked the same, with the same snacks vendor from 1973 calling out “Kahn-DAY.” It was repetitive enough that it went so far past annoying that it became calming. One day we’ll hear monks hum “Kahn-DAY” in their meditation.

I lost my first $200 before the first round was even finished.

It was 100NL but with strange $2 small and $3 big blinds. As if there isn’t enough action in a California card room, this caused raises to be in the $20 range. In Vegas, raises at the 100NL 1/2 are generally $15. Online, raises are more respectable at $6 or $8. That’s one reason live NL is more profitable than online, and also why bad players at limit games are scarcer: most have moved to no-limit.

Except, well, Hawaiian Gardens. Players at HI-G just like to gamble.

I picked up 10-10 in late and raised $20 and three people came along.

Three people. With those odds, I was surprised there wasn’t a fourth caller.

The flop was undercards – 4-8-2 (rainbow). A limper bet $40. Folded to me. I put him on A-8 and pushed. With $75 left, it didn’t make much sense just to call.

He called instantly and the turn gave a Q, river gave a J.

He said “Queen” and flipped Q9o.

Obviously I missed the runner straight possibility on the flop. He said he put me on Ace-King. Yeah, but that still beat Q high, didn’t it?

I didn’t say anything, just mucked, rebought, and buckled in.

And by buckling in, I mean bending over.

Three hands later I picked up KQo with the Queen of spades.

Raised $15. Three callers. There’s no grabbing up blinds in California uncontested.

Flop was all spades with a King.

I checked, intending to check-raise.

It’s checked around. Oops.

The turn was blank and I pushed.

Two callers.

One didn’t show, and one showed 23s, for a flopped flush.

No other spade fell, and if it had, I probably would’ve been dead to the other guy if he had the Ace of spades.

I was done with no-limit in less than 10 minutes.

A $4 fee + $4 bank fee trip to the ATM bought me in again, but the second rebuy didn’t go very far with $2 and $3 blinds, no cards, and lots of Asian aggression.

I’m sure I didn’t ask Santa for the continual no-limit beats, but I may be on the naughty list.

Feeling very much kicked and sore and beaten, I retreated to 4/8 limit and tossed around chips. Fortunately, blackjack and pai gow were completely full, or else I would’ve run out the rest of my ATM withdrawal.

grubette ended the evening the only winner.

We decided to call it an evening (at 3 a.m.) before any further damage could be done.

With NETeller on its way out and Vegas cardrooms being either too crowded or not crowded enough, it’s comforting to know the California cardroom will always be full of action.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, January 17th, 2007 at 2:55 am and is filed under Uncategorized.