Grubby at PokerWorks

If you want to see me weep openly, just pull up my NETeller account and checking account and compare. One is larger than the other, and that same one is frozen by the U.S. government.

So I’m pretty immune to bad beats at this point; the ultimate beat is not being able to access money that’s yours.

If we’re ever able to withdraw from NETeller, they’d better add interest.

Another 100 percent match of $400 was offered this weekend at the online casino, and I still can’t find a deposit method that will work, so I have to pass again and watch it expire.

The feeling is akin to sticking my wet nose against the window of a restaurant, salivating at the delicious food people are eating.

(Speaking of food, I finally saw Pan’s Labyrinth. Loved it except for the bothersome Pale Man and the feast scene. I understand that the movie was about fascism and the consequences of blindly obeying authority, but I think Ofelia needed another beat before she did what she did… in that scene, she disobeys twice with no strong visual motivation. We knew she missed dinner the night before, but she didn’t display any signs of hunger. It was a bold, conscious choice, and it should’ve been made clearer.)Â

Unlike poker bonuses, the casino bonus deposits directly to my account to gamble with immediately. In the past, I’ve deposited, withdrawn, and then received the bonus to play with. Pure casino money. I could then either play the required playthrough or cash out any amount over the bonus.

It was win-win either way.

Not being able to withdraw makes this method problematic, but if I could deposit, I’d just autoplay blackjack at $1 per hand to meet wage requirements. At $1/hand, the risk of ruin for $400 is pretty small.

My host emailed to express how they’re just as frustrated with U.S. players being unable to deposit. It probably hurts them more, because I’m such a losing player at the casino that I’ve never posted a winning month.

They mentioned something interesting about their payment processing houses.

If your credit and debit cards have been denied, wait half an hour and try depositing an odd amount, such as $497.34 instead of $500.

Doing so increases your chance that a different processing house will perform the transaction. Because the online casinos (and poker sites, I presume) aren’t financial institutions, they use multiple processing houses for their transactions.

Odd amounts or no, I still haven’t been able to deposit successfully to the casino.

UltimateBet had a promotion this weekend of an instant 10 percent free tournament dollars on a max $500 deposit.

I purchased a $300 virtual gift card at giftcards.com and UB declined it at first. A screen appeared giving the choice of trying with another processing house, and it worked the second time.

UB allows blackjack, and well, there went my $300 on $15 bets.

Whenever I log into my bank account, I see a picture of a penguin and the self-entered phrase “Fuck Blackjack.” Evidently the reverse is true.

Switched to Stars with a more aggressive style in SnGs — going all-in with draws — and sometimes it worked, but more often it didn’t. On one hand I counted 15 outs for an open-ended straight flush draw that had me a favorite, but didn’t hit.

Another hand I flopped a straight flush with 46s and pushed the flop, hoping someone had an overpair or suited paint, but no takers.

I may have to revise this style. I know it would work better in cash games (often I can take a pot with a river pot raise), but I can’t risk losing that much if they end up calling.

Earned enough points to get me to SilverStar and to clear my final three $120 bonuses.

In Stars’ FPP Store, I have enough points to name a star.

I once dated a girl who wanted to name a star for me for Christmas. That isn’t my type of sentiment, and if you’re sending money to a scam, I’d rather see it go to a third-world child with flies around his head. That, or online gambling. Not sure which is the bigger scam these days.

I wonder if you can name a star something filthy. Not censorable, but something silly like “Grubby’s Penis.” I might be tempted into trying, because there isn’t anything else interesting at my level of points except autographed poker books.

I do miss Full Tilt and am hoping they hurry up with their bonus so I can return. So many things about Stars bother me, which I’ll get into in another time.

With the tournament dollars credited and a $0 balance, I entered two SnGs and somehow won both for $125 total. Played blackjack sparingly and doubled my balance before dropping to $200.

At UB, I have over $2700 in bonus dollars still to clear, but blackjack may be too much of a temptation to stay there. I do like how the bonus releases incrementally, so let’s see how far I can take the $200.

This entry was posted on Sunday, February 18th, 2007 at 11:12 pm and is filed under Uncategorized.