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Poker News | Online Poker | News

Poker Plus - Tapping The Tank

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There are a million things poker players do that is totally lacking in class and poker etiquette but THE one thing is just plain stupidity; Tapping the fish tank.

Without fish, those of us who play for profit would have a very tough time pumping up our bankroll. Who wants to sit down with the rocks? You know the rocks, trying to make their $10 a day no matter how long it takes, never raising on anything less than A-K suited. Bless those little fishies, they are our bread and butter, so why insult them?

This is a question I have asked myself for years, but so far, have found no valid answer. The closest reason I can come up with is the dork throwing the insults thinks it will get the live-one on tilt. This line of reasoning is really stupid, because you don’t have to get a fish tilting, they will give you their chips anyway. Time after time I have seen players go off on the fish, telling them what an idiot donk they are. The only purpose this serves is for the fish to swim away and find a friendlier pond, leaving you with the other sharks to eat their own.

Every player gets irritated with the suck-outs, runner- runner miracles and being beat to death. Unless you are a total fish; it doesn’t seem to bother a fish as much, probably because they are used to losing and even expect to when they play. For the rest of us, continually getting good hands stuffed wears down our patience and nice guy demeanor. It is very hard to keep quiet when you are getting pounded by the donk playing any two cards and winning. When this happens and your patience flew out the window hours ago, sit back and remember what Mama used to say, “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.”

When playing online, keeping your mouth shut is not required; you can yell, scream and call the donks any names you want. This may be a problem if you don’t happen to be alone, unless whoever is around understands, and if they live with a poker player, they should be used to it! It is easier to be polite even when you least feel like it when you play online, just stay away from the keyboard and the chat box.

The fact is the world is full of rude, crass, brainless jerks. The internet and poker sites are no exception, the idiots are there too, just waiting to vent their anger at losing or life on their captive audience at the poker table. The advantage of having them at your table online instead of in a B&M poker room is you can mute them! You never have to read their vile rants, as all poker sites have a block chat option, and you should use it, so you can play in peace. Too bad it is not that easy in a live game!

If a player is being obnoxious, you also can report them, and you should. I have reported many players over the years and the poker site has warned them and/or revoked their chat privileges. It is a joy to see the jerk sit at the table and instead of his avatar showing where he is from, it reads “no chat”. It makes me feel great to know the site has done what they are supposed to do, taking action against a player who does nothing but make the game miserable for everyone.

Years ago I played on a site and made a flush, beating a guy’s trips. He blasted me, calling me names, not the least of which was an idiot, for drawing to a flush. The bad part was, he stalked me. Whenever I played, he was there talking trash and harassing me. I reported him every time and the site did nothing to stop him. I then asked them if I could change my user name since they refused to stop the harassment, and they said no. I hated to quit that site as I made money there, but even muting him and reporting him didn’t work, so I left and never went back. I won’t name the site but it was huge, and since the UIGEA they blocked USA players, so it is all a moot point now, I couldn’t go back if I wanted to.

The point is that if poker sites don’t do everything they can to ensure a pleasant game for their players, they will end up with a place only the classless jerks play. Luckily the reputable poker sites DO enforce behavior rules making most of the games we play in enjoyable for all.

The next time you are in the middle of a donkfest, remember, don’t tap the fish tank and run them off, eventually they will lose that horseshoe. Then your skill and patience will pay off and your bankroll will benefit!

Grab a chair…see you there!

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