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Poker News | PokerWorks Op-Ed

Poker Pundit - Dan "Wretchy" Martin – Introductions, Poker and Beer Pong

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A blog of sorts, a story to be told, the true depth of poker is about to unfold:

This is my first blog that I've done since dabbling before with MHREP, so it might take me one or two of these before I get back into the swing of things. Right now I will do a little update of poker along with some other things that have been going on in my life.

For those of you who don't know me, I'm a high stakes MTT grinder on PokerStars, Full Tilt Poker, and Ultimate Bet. I also play a lot of live events this year, being that I am almost 23 it's only my second year really playing live events. Currently, I live in Klamath Falls, Oregon, a city in Southern Oregon, about 15 miles from the border of California. I went to high school there and just being graduated from college with a degree in accounting, I find it a little odd being back in the hometown.

I've been in Las Vegas for about two weeks and am about to play the 25k WPT Championship, but I will get to that later. I plan on spending basically June-July in Las Vegas for the World Series of Poker, then deciding where to go from there.

I will go ahead and bore you with the poker details; I've been playing the Bellagio prelim events before the 25k WPT Championship. I have played four 5k's, two 3k's, and haven't cashed in a single one. I bubbled an earlier 5k in 5th place, the fields have been horrendous, with, I'm guessing, most of the players in Europe for San Remo.

However, I've had a little luck online during this period, cashing for 31k in the Full Tilt Poker 750,000 on Sunday, along with 5th in the 75k during the same day for an additional 6k. I feel like I've been playing awesome poker but just haven't had the flips go my way yet. For all of those guys out there grinding it out, I feel your pain and will be joining you after this WPT event.

I am playing on Saturday, Day 1A, the starting stacks have increased to 4x the buy-in, so for those of you horrible at math out there, that's a whopping 100k starting stack. I was talking with Shaun Deeb about the starting stack and he explained you could sit out the complete first day, and come back to Day 2 with 80k at 400/800.  LOL. As much as I think it's a terrible idea, I have been losing a lot of my chips early to coolers so it would possibly be +EV for me to do something like that. Most likely, I will just play and try not to donk off my huge stack. On a side note, I am no longer working with PokerPwnage and hopefully will be coming to you guys with some more news in the near future regarding coaching.

Now on to the fun stuff.

On Monday, the Doyle Brunson Annual Beer Pong Tournament was held at Hogs and Heifers in downtown Las Vegas. There were a total of 32 teams that showed up, making it an interesting field to go through. A buddy of mine, Mr. Peter "Number1Pen" Neff, was my partner in crime. Our first match we faced.... well at this point it's hard to remember that night because it was so epic, but I'm pretty sure it was just two random guys from the bar.

Before thinking that these two random people from the bar have no idea what's going on when it comes to beer pong, let me explain what type of bar this was. As we jumped out of the cab on the corner to head towards the bar, there were about fifteen motorcycles parked in front, with about twenty people milling around outside. Inside, the bartenders were dancing on the bar. This was no ordinary, hot chick you see dancing on the bar scenario though, this was AC~DC blasting over the speakers with the bartenders doing some kind of country two-step. It was really quite an interesting sight to see. So back to the two randoms, Peter and I destroy these guys by two or three cups, inflating my ego and my alcohol level. It’s always nice to get through your first win of the game so you have a little confidence going into the next round, luckily for us we knew our next match, a team of a really, really, really good looking girl and a goofy looking guy.

This match started off like our other match, by me telling the other team, "Good luck, you're going to need it."

I'm not 100% positive on this but I think that we went off to an early lead, sinking three or four cups before they even had one. The game continued where the girl was a complete sicko, sinking three or four balls in a row on her turn. However, Peter had stepped his game up, with a hot chick on the other side of the table I think he was trying to prove himself. He sunk the next three balls, one with a balls-back for us, leaving them with two cups and us with two cups to go. It was my shot, and the girl started lifting up her shirt, trying to pull the distraction on us, well, it didn't work with me. I shipped one of the final two cups, and it was up to Peter to end the game right there.

The girl then started pulling her jeans down, just low enough to say, I'm not wearing any panties. That was the end of our turn and I still don't think to this day that Peter has ever missed a shot so badly in his life than right there. Being the other teams shot, I decided to play a little defense myself and show some skin. I believe that the alcohol had played a factor in this, but I showed my stomach and nipples while they were shooting. Now, I'm not gonna say that my nice body was the reason they missed the shot, but I think it was a factor. With his head back on his shoulders, Peter sunk the final ball to ship us the victory to the championship game of our bracket, against two of the bar's own beer pong team.

I'm not going to bore you with the details of this match. The real match was happening next to us where Brandon Cantu and Jeff Madsen were playing their championship match at their table. Winner of their match and our match played each other in the semi-finals of the beer pong tournament. There was constant shit-talking occurring during this time, however, we both wanted each other to win so we could battle in the next match. Cantu actually came up with a miracle and sunk a shot in order for them to win their match, so the focus was then turned to our match, where we were crushing our opponents. We had sunk six cups while they were still blank, not hitting one of ours. We finally put an end to the bar team, and this was about the time that I started getting really drunk. Peter and I had pre-game drank a few beers before we even started playing and had been drinking beers in between our matches while we waited for our next opponent.

The time had come, Madsen v. Martin, Neff v. Cantu, the match of the century was about to start and we had quite a crowd around the table watching.

We started the match on fire, immediately sinking both cups for balls back and then sinking one more to put us up 3-0 on Madsen and Cantu. Peter and I were talking trash, high-fiving, and probably the loudest people in the bar yelling and screaming every time we sunk a shot. I was trying to tilt Madsen a little during this match so I could have the upper-hand on him for once in my life. You see, I played with Madsen in LA where he put a pretty sick beat on me, being the person that I am, I have to talk shit to him the rest of my life because of this. Madsen and Cantu are both really cool guys and are a blast to hang out with, but when it comes to war at the beer pong table, there are no allies. They promptly made a comeback and sunk both cups for balls back and then missing both shots.

Peter and I had gone up a few cups and were down to two cups, while I believe they still had three or four cups remaining. Before we started playing beer pong for the day, the bar had us sign the beer pong tables for whatever reason, I think they were planning on selling them for charity. My signature was signed, "Wretchy owns Jeff Madsen, GG." Every time I hit a shot that night against that team, I proceeded to tap the table where I had wrote that, rubbing it in their face a little more.

Madsen had been yelling at me, "Wretchy, you're nothing, not even a good poker player, you will NOT hit this shot."

Sadly for Madsen, I work best under extreme circumstances, and sunk the shot in the front cup, leaving my follow through up in the air for everyone to see. We were down to one cup, they had three left, Peter lined up to shoot and nailed the cup, seemingly, putting an end to the match and putting us to the finals. Madsen had other plans though, with the rebuttal, Cantu shanked one pretty bad off the right, Madsen stepped up, looked us right in the eye, and sunk the cup to prolong the match. It took us a minute to finally recover, but Peter finally sunk the last cup celebrating with a jumping chest bump, sending us to the Championship match against Todd Bruson and Gank. I forever have bragging rights over Madsen and Cantu, GG boys.

I'm going to leave this in a bit of suspension so you have to read my next blog to find out what happened in the Championship Match, along with my thoughts from the Bellagio 25k WPT Championship Tournament.

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